Do You Want to Win Back Lost Love?
If you want to blow some life back into the embers of an old flame, understand that sometimes the tinder is damp, and the ember is barely there. Even if you’ve reached a point where you’re constantly thinking about what you could’ve done better on the old relationship, that’s no guarantee that you can re-spark things.
You thought the grass was greener on the other side and then realized that it was an illusion. You realize that the love you had a long time ago may be what you are missing. Here are some things to think about when you want to win back lost love from long ago.
Take the time to assess what you’ve already got. Most people who regret the path not taken failed to take advantage of the opportunities before them, and they regretted it. Make sure you’re not about to give up something good now to rekindle old flames.
If you don’t want to spend your life looking backwards at your old choices, make a conscious effort to look at the life and the love you have now. It’s better to love who you’re with and make that work than to live a life of regret over a sequence of lost loves given up to short sighted goals.
It’s also worthwhile to ask if they’ve moved on. Quite honestly, time wounds all heels, and heals all wounds. Just because you’re not happy with your present partner and are longing for what you gave up doesn’t mean they’re feeling the same way about you. Trying to re-open a dormant relationship could hurt both of you.
Look to see if they’re content. If they are, let them go and let them be. It’s not an easy decision to make, but it’s the right one for everyone involved.
Third, understand that people change over time. Things may have happened in both of your lives that may have made you very different people. Dont do this to try and relive what once was. Try to win back lost love because you believe that your future will be better than your present and even your past with this person.
Fourth, start off slowly. If they arent expecting you to come calling and all of the sudden you are there constantly it may smell of desperation. You may be desperate and be somewhat obsessed about them but dont let them know.
Build up to it slowly. Don’t tell them how much you love them and can’t live without them. (If you can’t live without me, why aren’t you dead yet? is a good phrase to remember.) Take the time to know them, befriend them, and let them know you, and how you’ve changed for the better.
Focus on the future. Show how things will go better this time, rather than revisiting old memories. Trying to relive the past will only doom this relationship to disaster and failure.
You need to make the most of the chances you’re given, and you need to focus on what you (and they) stand to gain from linking up again. Take advantage of today, so that tomorrow is not full of regrets for choices left unmade. If you’re going to have a chance at making this love work again, you need to live in the moment, not the past.
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